Saturday - Time Flies

I didn't sleep well again last night.  Mild headache and shoulder ache this morning.  I couldn't lift my right arm higher than just below shoulder height before it hurt too much to go further.  That eased a little by the end of the day but not 100%.

It's a silly thing.  Something that has probably happened several times in my life, something that's annoying and quickly forgotten when it gets better.  A little heating rub, a little rest.  But today.  This year.  This month.  It feels bigger.  It's as if everything is magnified, the highs and the lows.

I feel the feelings.  All the way when I can.  Then I let it go and move forward toward an uncertain future.

So of course this morning's next episode I'm listening to as I catch up on Malcolm Gladwell's Revisionist History podcast is about sad songs.  But country sad songs are honest and real songs.  You feel the feelings, all the way through, so you can heal and get better and ... move forward toward that uncertain future.  The future's always uncertain, it's just these days we remember and are more aware of that fact.  We have to acknowledge it because the chances are 100% that the world on the other side will not be the same as it was 33 days ago.  We will not be the same in a big way - not a gradual evolving way.

I finished up a job, then worked on masks.  At one point I looked up from the ironing board and saw Lily out on the driveway nibbling at the bottle brush bush.  I went out with alfalfa and threw half in the pen.  She came to me but then dodged when I reached for her.  I held the remaining alfalfa out and she came over again but then dodged again.  I threw the rest into the pen and when she came back again, a light bulb went off.  I opened the gate.  She walked right in.

I picked up groceries from Jess that she had delivered to her house earlier today and dropped off a couple of masks.  We chatted at 10 feet apart for a while.  It's so strange to be so far apart with such a short visit but I felt lighter on the drive home.  My late departure meant that I didn't get to howl with my neighbor, but I did hear howling in the distance in Windsor.  Jessi's neighborhood is very quiet.

I cooked up some farmer's market pork shoulder, shredded it, and made some more salsa.  Dinner was a good combination of those ingredients in burritos  I enjoyed that while watching the Together at Home special.  There were some really good moments, enough to make me keep and not delete it yet.

Ollie likes having people around and has been indoors more often this past month because he likes people, but he does miss going outside.  We may try tomorrow.  He's been indoors since we saw the bobcat.

To bed before 1:00 a.m.  We are well and I hope you are too.